Do you really know how to set goals or do you just write a bunch of ‘wants’ on a piece of paper and hope for the best?  Goals are great things to have because they keep us focused and wanting more of ourselves, but do you write them risk free?  Do you stop short of really demanding something of yourself that might possibly illicit a change out of you?  What I really want to know is…

How High Would You Climb If You Could Not Fall?

I want to know.  If you knew there is was no chance of you falling, how high would you go?  What would you write on that piece of paper as a goal?  Why would knowing you would not fall change anything? 

GOAL SETTING

Here is one task that I truly feel is misinterpreted.  There are many theories about goal setting and I do not want to go into any of them in this post but Mindtools and MyGoals.com both have great theories on how to set goals and put them into action so you can check them out if you want to be super technical about it.  But I want you to think before you even go there to learn how to put any goal you have in action, “Am I already limiting myself when I set my goal?”  When you go to write that goal down and put it into action, is it already clipped at the edges to make it pretty and doable lest you stick your neck out a little and take a risk?

ENDLESS GUARANTEES

(This is for the ladies, guys.  Sorry.  I have one coming for you soon, hang tight.)

We women need to Believe.  We have an insatiable desire to believe in something and invest in it.  It is hard wired into our system.  When we were younger, it was the hot band/singer at the time.  As we aged, it was a college professor.  Getting into the work field had us looking up to our mentors/leaders ahead of us.  No matter what stage of life we are in, we are looking to believe…so that we know we can do it, too.  We need reassurance.  We need a guarantee.  We need to know that we are not just making something up and that it can be done.  And then when we have that, we need it some more.  And then we look in more places for more reassurance.  And finally, we look again!  In other words, we very rarely come to a place where we believe that we too can achieve the task at hand and we are in a never ending search for a guarantee that we can do what we are setting out to do. 

REVERSE THE PROCESS

Instead of having you write down a lofty goal and then filling you with endless quotes as to why you are good enough to do what you want to do, I want to just ask again:

What is going to happen if you do not achieve that goal?  OR

How High Would You Climb If You Could Not Fall?

If there is no risk of harm, why stop climbing?  Can you write that out for yourself?  What is the worst thing that can happen if you set a lofty goal, take a risk and then fall short of it?  Will you lose your house?  Will it end your marriage?  Can you still pay for your kids to go to school?  What’s the worst thing that can happen?  Why can’t we just Trust and Believe that if we do what we are supposed to, that everything else will fall in place?  Where are we failing ourselves?

We buy into products (Mary Kay, Pampered Chef), people (Tony Robbins, Deepak Chopra), methods (The Secret) and etc. and we become motivated enough to sit down and write goals for someone we do not believe in!!  Is anybody hearing me here??  Invest in yourself!  Believe in yourself because I ask one more time, “What’s the worst thing that can happen if you fall short of that goal?”  You would either try again or analyze what went wrong and fix it.  But no matter what, you would be a better person in the end.  You will have learned, grown, expanded, become more confident just knowing the world didn’t explode—you will have done something more than just the usual, “I want to lose 5 pounds.” 

Sticking your neck out is rewarding.  Standing up to your fears is tremendous.  Yes, you did not get the part in the Broadway show that you wanted (totally made up scenario here), but you went to 10 auditions and met 2 influential producers and got some great experience in the mean time.  You would have never done that the year before so yes, you fell short of your goal and you may feel dejected because you did not get the part, but guess what, you are still alive and you can still perform.  What was the risk?

FACING FACTS

I feel like Mondays are a time when everyone sits down and writes up new goals for the week, month or whatever.  Go ahead, write your normal goals down on paper…and then write one helluva whopper of a goal that makes you shake in your boots.  Go ahead, I dare you.  What’s the worst that could happen?

Make this a good week, folks! 

p.s. My little one is much better.  Thank you everyone!:o)